Saw our private mortgage lender this morning and asked him once again about a refinance.
The spouse is stressing out regarding our mortgage payment which, although it is 'only' $900/month, he feels is too high. Our credit has improved and it may have improved just enough to push us into a more 'lendable' category ..... we shall see.
We want a fully amortized loan, enough of this interest only shyte. I'd like to pay this entire mortgage off altogether but that just isn't going to happen right now because we are short in our mortgage pay-off savings account.
In other goings on, the spouse and I are on Day One of a juice fast. It's not really a fast per se because we are allowed 4 smoothies a day but the spouse is hungry and snappy already but I am doing fine on it LOL I jogged/ran for an hour on the treadmill this morning and then hit the trails with the spouse panting behind. We have two more days of this smoothie-only regimen and then we'll return to 'normal' food on Monday. It's hilarious listening to the spouse bitch and whine about his hunger but I know from personal experience that's it's difficult to exchange bad habits for good and so for the most part I remain patient with him. It takes effort and commitment to lose weight and to maintain a regular exercise program.
I am at 'that place' in my mind that's telling me it's OK ~ I can't stuff my face on chips and chocolate, that I cannot stick my face into the fridge searching for something to graze on. I'm not in a panic over not being able to eat anything that's not included in the program this weekend and I am not anxious about it. Anxiety has always been my undoing in the past but it's not winning today. The spouse however isn't at 'that place' yet .... it's gonna take a while for him.
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7 comments:
If you don't want to eat it, don't have it in the house. At least make yourself have to work to eat it, like go out to the store and buy it.
Agree with Jerry - if it's not in the house, how likely would you be to jump in the car to go buy it (not likely for you since it's a long-ass haul in to town!! ha ha). And I'm sure it is harder for the hubby - he works all day - and you are home. Men typically need more "energy" than women do, too. Be patient with the poor guy....
I don't think going hungry is a good first step... extreme diets have been proven not to work long term, and your bodies/lifestyles are different. You can be "full" and still eat less calories/carbs/fat than your limit allows. It requires some planning and creativity. Drop diets. Go for lifestyle changes.
@Jerry ~ I have always agreed with what you are saying. For years, I've been saying, "We can't eat that! We shouldn't buy it!" but then my/our weak will wins over and I buy crap we shouldn't be eating. I always give in, especially to the spouse, but I want to add that we've made a lot of progress over the past few years. Man, it just takes me SO LONG to make changes ..... or am I 'normal'? Does it take everyone as long as it seems to take me to make changes?? Well, I cleaned out the fridge, freezer and pantry last week and tossed out anything that we shouldn't be eating .... and we are doing fine so far. Staying out of restaurants, cooking at home and only bringing in food that isn't going to screw us up!!
@Susie Q ~ LOL he's doing better today! Not as grumpy and not feeling AS hungry as yesterday. Yes, he needs more energy than I do which is why he had to have a sandwich last night LOL I couldn't take anymore of his complaining and he was actually beginning to look ill subsisting on juice all day but he perked right up after that sandwich.
@Tanner ~ Yes, I agree with you and we have been making lifestyle changes for a long time now but the juice fast is just something we wanted to try for the weekend to see if we could do it. We are still having problems controlling caloric intake .... the food is healthy and it's all home cooked but we are eating too much of it still. It's as if we can't get a grip on our portion control. I came from a household that regularly ran on empty and the spouse came from a household in which his mother hoarded food and turned everyone into a butterball .... we just need to get a feeling for being hungry and exactly how much food our daily caloric intake will allow. It has been difficult for us to 'outgrow' our childhood programming, even now. But .... we WILL win eventually :)
I have the same issue with portion control. I can't help that I got my cooking skills from mom!
In all seriousness, it does stem from childhood habits. My mom is a fantastic cook and her food begs to be eaten! If there were leftovers, I'd swoop in and dessimate it. It doesn't help that I tend to put double portions on my plate to begin with when it's a favorite meal; and favorite meals in our house came quite often as everything was oh-so de-licious!
Now that I'm an adult and cooking for myself, it's difficult to curb myself when I make something tasty. There's no one to yell at me other than myself...except my waistline.
At least, to make sure we have lunch the next day, I pack it away before we start to eat. That way, I know the next day is taken care of and whatever left is fair game. Maybe that should change? I realize now that I'm setting myself up with these extra portions. They really should become a back-up meal instead of extra helpings.
Food, my greatest addiction in life.
You may have to temper your spouse's expectations, since paying principle is likely to add a couple hundred more a month. Hopefully though you'll get a better rate to offset most of that. But just remember you'll actually be gaining equity rather than essentially renting the house from the bank.
@jxm ~ I used to stuff myself because I am an emotional overeater. I used to reward myself for a good day and I used to punish myself if I'd had a bad day. It was a comfort mechanism, a way to cope. These days, I analyze my every move. Micromanaging is tiresome but I have found that it is the only way for me to effect change. If I want to change a bad habit, I now know that I have to work at it for years LOLS Finally, the changes stick. I adore eating, I adore food. I am an addict. However, I don't want to live my life trapped inside an obese body and so I have to force change. I make incremental changes because there is no way I can do anything cold turkey!!!
@csdx ~ Yes, we need to refinance this mortgage! It will be nice to see principal decreasing for a change rather than staying the same year after year.
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